Anonymous Story

1)What personal experiences with mental health do you have? Either with yourself, athletes in your area or friends.

Looking back, I've struggled with my mental health for a long time. As a teenager I had had huge body confidence issues and throughout my whole life, a poor relationship with food. Low mood and fatigue, resorting to alcohol and staying away from social situations were all part of my early 20s. I sought counselling after an emotionally abusive relationship which helped for a short time, enough to pick myself up and get a new job/move away etc. However I don't think I ever really tackled any root causes of my depression and about 3 years after I had my first son, I hit "rock bottom" and asked for help. This was 2010 and the first thing the doctor did was prescribe me anti-depressants. I stopped drinking completely and took the pills. I wouldn't say they helped, they just made it possible for me to function. I became a bit numb to emotion, but again, they didn't tackle any root causes, they were just a sticking plaster. I've sought counselling on two other separate occasions for various things; one was emetophobia (which got so bad, I would barely go out if I could at all help it and I dreaded winter/going to work) and the other most recent was when I was feeling lost, struggling with my purpose and crippling anxiety. Daily panic attacks and feelings of total worthlessness mounted up and had me wishing I was no longer on this planet. I feel fortunate enough to be surrounded by people who recognised this took simple steps to help me help myself. 

I'm also a teacher in a secondary school for boys. Mental health and well-being is a huge part of my day to day job, both for my students and staff. The well-being of staff in particular is on most schools agendas these days and in recent news, new trainees are to be developed in the areas of mental health and fitness. I honestly feel that a lot of the strategies in place are fire-fighting actions and still don't really tackle the root cause of the stresses and strains and expectations of teachers and senior leaders. I've yet to see personally, constructive and purposeful attempts to reduce workload and stress, but unfortunately money is often the obstacle. 

2)How do you feel sport/fitness affects mental health?

I feel sport and fitness have a fundamental effect on mental health and over all well-being. It advocates looking after yourself, that you care about yourself and that you deserve to be fit and healthy; this has a huge impact on confidence and self worth. Even just getting out for a walk to clear your head can make you feel a million times better than sitting on the sofa with your favourite biscuit and a cuppa. After night after night of sleep deprivation with a newborn baby, getting some fresh air and gentle exercise took away the doom and gloom, even if just for a few moments and refreshes you enough to feel that you can carry on and it's not all that bad. Feeling physically stronger helps you feel mentally stronger I think. It's empowering. I also think that if you're part of a fitness community, whether than be a running club, bowls team, cycling, wheel chair basketball etc that the connection with people is also great for our mental health. At the end of the day we're animals who need to be active and need social interaction (on our terms) to function. 

3)What advice do you have for people in sport/fitness who struggle with mental health issues?

Tackle the root cause. Don't patch up the symptoms, keep asking why until you get to the answers. There's absolutely no point to keep doing what you're doing, the way you're doing it if it's not working and it's still not making you feel better. Get to the real reasons and problem solve from there. 

4)What advice do you wish you had been given before going through (or observing) the experiences you have? 

That it's ok to talk, that it's ok to open up and it's ok to be you. I've struggled to accept me and assumed I'm the worst person on the planet for so long, assumed that everyone thought I was too arrogant, or stupid, or weak, or too fat, or too selfish, too middle of the road and not an expert in anything etc and never allowed compliments to affect me in a positive way. I wish I'd been told it's ok to be selfish.